Now playing: Estelle - American Boy
via FoxyTunes Ok I don't really hate my life, I love the many blessings I have but Got damn!!! At the start of my day, I always tell myself, "This is gonna be a good day, stay positive just believe." Anyways, get to my stinking ass job, gotta take the garbage out and the elevators broken. Ok no problem, I'll just drag all the garbage cans down the stairs. Go down, put the garbage in the dumpster, realize I'm locked out. Ok so I start to walk the other way and slip in melting ice and land in a puddle of stinking garbage slush which had been collecting in front of the dumpster and mixed in with the snow. Ok so being locked out I drag the garbage cans through the movie theater into the mall only to find of course, the up escalators not working the down escalator is of course and there's some little kid playing on the escalator blocking my path. I say excuse me repeatedly and he just ignores me so I start to loose my patients and get in an argument with his parents. Finally make it back to the kitchen and get yelled at for taking to long to take the garbage out. To make my day even better, I'm told that nobody cleaned the refrigerator area floor like they were supposed to so I have to clean it (typically, not only do I have to do my job, but also everyone Else's and the grimy jobs no one else will do). I have to hand wash the rubber mat on the floor which has years worth of rotting vegetables on it and stinks like shit (Literally). So now not only do I smell like garbage I smell like rotten vegetables. Of course everyone notices the stench and won't shut up about it. Then I find out that the wash pump in the sink is broken so I have to scrub every dish by hand great!!!
BEWARE GRAPHIC IMAGES BELOW!!!
(This being about 5% of the amount of dishes I have to do every night)
On top of all that I have a condition were my blood pressure drops so low that most the day I'm extremely dizzy, nauseous, lethargic and fatigued from lack of oxygen reaching my brain. Sometimes my blood pressure drops so low that I pass out.
Those are the fryer filters I clean out most nights... That's and entire days worth of slop oil to clean out... I ended up face first in it being that I passed out while I was cleaning them. I regained consciousness to find my entire body was numb and I couldn't move and was struggling to breathe. I watched people walk by and ignore me slumped over in the filter for what seemed like 20 minutes before someone helped me.
Oh and on top of working 10-12 hour shifts in an insanely stressful and fast paced environment... My manager also makes fun of my illness and calls me a spaz. Don't worry law suite here I come. But I literally have to throw myself through every movement I make because my body feels like it's made of concrete, plus I have arthritis at the age of 25 so all my joints get swollen up, and my knees are messed up from previous injuries. Good thing they always got me on them scrubbing something while the other employees goof around and laugh, sometimes even sitting around. Nobody says anything to them when the lounge around doing nothing, giggling and acting stupid, but I get yelled at for not scrubbing fast enough.
Anyways, to top off my day, I finally finish work, call a taxi and they never show up... I call back and they tell they don't have anyone in the area. So... I have to walk home in the rain, a 3 mile walk by the way, most of which, being that there are no sidewalks is ankle deep through mud, or on the side of the highway, with traffic speeding behind me, not to mention the areas were I have to run across the highway to get to were I'm going. 2 hours later I'm finally home at 3 am and have to wake up at 6 am to do the same thing all over again. That's pretty much what a typical day looks like for me.
I think the best part is the guilt trips I get from people, "Oh this happens to you because you're not being positive enough, stop looking so tired and depressed, It's not that bad". FUCK YOU!!!!
After all this, I still use every last bit of strength to put towards my music, photography, art and videos. I really love what I do more then anything. Even if I only have an hour a week to work on it... I make it work, even though I don't make enough money for my rent, am being kicked out of my apartment, have no food, no money for groceries and the bank let some random company I've never heard of take all my money and charged me a fortune in over draft fee's.
I WILL CHANGE THINGS SOMEDAY!!!
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Now playing: Reel 2 Real - I Like To Move It
via FoxyTunes
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